Woman-on-top sex positions can be a real thrill for both of you. It can be great for the woman to take charge. It feels liberating, there’s a power-kick, and it enables her to set the depth and the pace of penetration, in ways that are just right for her. For the man, it’s great occasionally just to kick back and admire the view, and enjoy the feeling. And, for his sake, it can be worth the woman’s sparing a thought for a man’s feelings and responses during woman-on-top sex. There are one or two things he’d maybe like you to know, and it is entirely possible he hasn’t been able to find the ways to say them yet. Without wishing to make anyone self-conscious, here are one or two things for girls to bear in mind when you want to have sex in woman-on-top positions.
Has that man of yours been hankering for a little action by way of the back door? Has he asked outright for anal sex? Or does anal sex as yet remain a hesitant, wistful longing, showing up as the dominant motif of his internet browsing history? Does he want to do it to you? If so, great: because now it’s his turn to get on the receiving end. To chew pillow, to take it like a man, that is. Seriously, survey after survey reports this is a very popular activity. Here, then, is a handy handful of dos and don’ts to make his first (passive) anal sex experience actually really – really Wow!
Anal sex comes top of the list for a lot of men of things they’d really, really like to try. Maybe it’s because it’s a little bit naughty, as it were forbidden fruit. Maybe he’s been watching porn, where anal sex is a staple, and has come to believe the whole world must be doing it. Maybe there’s an element of power-play involved, and that’s the sexual kick. Maybe it’s that your ass is tight, so there’s a real grip on his penis, and real friction. Exploring anal sex positions is, let’s face it, not to everyone’s taste, but there are those, and plenty of them, who discover – to his delight! – they really rather like it. Here are some tips if you’d like to know if anal sex could be right for you.
When we’re thinking of the sex positions which can be great for G Spot stimulation, we should say first off that the very notion of the G Spot, let alone of ‘G Spot orgasms’, is controversial. Amazingly, you might think, we don’t really know what the G Spot is. There are theories: it could reflect the extension of the clitoris back into the body behind the front vaginal wall; it could reflect the ‘female prostate’, a.k.a. the Skene’s gland; it could be a little piece of good news called the urethral sponge. And, if you have been digging around in yourself and you can’t find one, our best advice is maybe to lose the hype.
The comfy sofa is a great place for exploring seated woman-on-top sex positions. It’s where a lot of us start thinking about having sex as the nights draw in, and with the fire on and some mood music playing, why take it upstairs? Girls, start with leaving your clothes on! From cuddling, get on top to kiss, and lay your hand on his groin to feel him harden. Depending on his choice of underwear, this might need releasing now. (It can get uncomfortable in there!) Talk sexy as you peel his pants open, and maybe invent a pet name if you haven’t already.
Many men love doggy-style sex for its pace and intensity, and sheer visceral thrill, as well as for the visuals and the feeling of dominance. It can also be great for both of you if you feel at all insecure about the facial expressions you make approaching orgasm, since you won’t be looking at each other’s face and can feel really free to let yourselves go. This can be a way of gaining in greater confidence, or if you feel the mood when you’re having sex generally could use a bit of a lift. For some women, though, there are issues with doggy-style sex. The stimulation offered might not be quite right, and there’s a risk of emotional disconnect – of feeling ignored.
In a healthy relationship, where you both talk to each other, it really shouldn’t be the case that the guy is worrying if the girl really did have an orgasm just then, or was that just a touch exaggerated? Guys do want their partners to have an orgasm – and this can put pressure on women too if they don’t want to ‘disappoint’. Explore sex positions to enhance her orgasm, and to help her come (almost) every time.
There are times when the gift of love with your partner means you want to dedicate some time to making him happy. It’s nice to treat our partner, watch him going all doe-eyed and helplessly grateful. When you’re having sex, explore sex positions that give him heightened sensation, tactile and visual, generally ‘wowing’ him, blowing his XY mind. And of course, while you’re giving him his treats, you can be making sure you’re getting yours.
On top and in control – exhibitionists don’t do it any other way! Stimulating all the senses, this sex position is forever one of the favourites. For the woman who likes to take the initiative and the man who enjoys watching his partner as they make love, woman-on-top sex positions cannot be beaten. And with deep penetration as an added bonus, they can increase the sexual pleasure for both partners in any loving relationship by adding new sensations to your lovemaking.
We’d like to respond to the messages you’ve sent describing issues you’ve faced with some sex positions due to physical differences both between you and your partner and between the two of you and the couples you’ve seen in the Lovers’ Guide programmes.
To start with, we’d like to say this: Let’s celebrate difference! We humans certainly do come in all different shapes and sizes – and what a boring world it would be if that weren’t the case. Some of these differences – height, for example, or penis size – are differences we’re born with and, even were we to want to, can’t do a whole lot about. (Indeed, it’s usually damaging to want to try.) Other differences – most obviously weight – can be largely the results of choices we make.