Anal sex toys such as dildos, butt plugs and vibrators can be a beautiful complement to your favourite sex positions. They make for great foreplay, then as well when you’re having anal sex they can enhance this experience, for bottom and top alike.
Warming up
It can simply be easier to open up and relax the bottom with a toy, especially if the top’s really well endowed. Depending on his experience and also his mood, there might be a girth the bottom can easily initially accommodate, and this can vary from day to day; we’ve probably all had those times when the bigger sex toys and the bigger cocks are too much for us, and any pain or discomfort experienced then can be a real turn off.
It’s useful to have in your toy collection a tapered toy such as a butt plug with a relatively narrow tip, so penetration is easy and you can stretch and relax the sphincters bit by bit. Get the bottom in the position you want to have sex in. Caress, kiss and lick his anus. Get him comfortable. Maybe he’d like to close his eyes. Bottoms, let your butt cheeks spread and push your anus towards your partner. Give him a decent view and easy access. You might both want to stroke yourselves and masturbate lightly at the same time.
Penetrate gently and play with the toy inside. Rotate the toy and swirl it around as well as moving in and out. Go slower than your cock will be going and build up the longing for a harder pace. If you’re using a vibrator instead of a butt plug, the vibrations can help to relax as well as stimulate your partner. Vary the speed and see how the impact changes as you angle the toy around.
Once you’ve withdrawn the toy, try inserting a couple of finger and feeling around inside him. This can be intense for him and the texture of his anus and rectum is great to explore.
More play
To prolong your sex play and really arouse the bottom, when you’re fucking him and before, use a vibrating butt plug or an inflatable butt plug and leave that in place while switching to giving him oral sex. If you choose a vibrating butt plug, that can sit comfortably in place and keep him thinking of you inside of you inside him while deepening his feeling of his own erection. With an inflatable toy, you can really boost his prostate sensation, alternately inflating and partially deflating the toy – or giving him the pump so he has control. There’s a wonderful contrast between this kind of anal stimulation and the feeling of you thrusting into him. The taste of his cock and balls as you lick and suck him should also be a real turn on for you.
Bend over boyfriend
Of course, a majority of gay men are not 100% top or bottom. When you’re fucking your partner, a little anal stimulation of your own can just be the ticket you need to turn a great-already experience into a truly wild, absolutely satisfying experience. You might want to force your ass onto your partner’s mouth to rim before fucking him. When you’ve lubed yourself up you can wipe the excess off on your own anus and slip a finger or two into yourself. For sustained anal stimulation for you while you penetrate your partner, a butt plug that’s going to stay in place is usually most convenient. (If you’re playing bottom on top, you get more scope to explore with, for example, dildos with suction caps, so they’ll stay in place while you bounce around over them.) In terms of size and shape, you want a dildo that’s going to enhance your erection and your feeling of being hard and genitally aroused, and not so big that the anal sensation takes you over completely. If you’re not used to being fucked yourself or using big sex toys, a slender prostate massager such as the Aneros could be best for you. If you like a little more bulk inside, a vibrating but plug such as the can deliver a whole range of sensations which complement your anal sex.
If the top’s using a butt plug, the bottom can play with that as well even while he’s being fucked and add to his partner’s arousal. In missionary position sex, use your heel to press against the plug and your partner’s anus, squishing it around while you also draw your partner further into you. In doggy style sex positions, reach beneath with your hand to massage your partner’s perineum and push against the toy. As a bottom, you might find that your being active in this way boosts your experience of anal sex.