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Gay Sexual Health

Painful Anal Sex

Painful gay sex

Anal sex shouldn’t be painful, assuming you do not wish to experience pain. If it does hurt, there are a number of things which might be going wrong, most of which can dealt with.

  1. Are you using enough lube? A degree of friction can feel pleasant, though isn’t the safest way of using condoms, but insufficient lubrication can mean sex hurts – which also means you’ll probably clench, this leading to further pain. If in doubt, use a lot more lube.
  2. Are you sufficiently relaxed when your partner enters you? Have you or he ‘warmed up’ your anus before hand – using his tongue or your (plural) hands. Spend a good few minutes, at least, on anal foreplay before penetration.
  3. Do you have a problem with your anus or bowels such as hemorrhoids (piles) or irritable bowel syndrome. If so, have a check up at the doctors’. Extra lubrication, again, can help.
  4. Does he have a super-size penis? It is profoundly unlikely you won’t be able physically to cope, but do take penetration slowly.
  5. Do you really want to have sex with this person? If you don’t, you won’t be fully relaxed and at ease – able to open up, literally and emotionally, with him. It could be that this is the wrong person, or that it’s sex too soon.
  6. Can you express your mounting sensations and feelings as sex progresses? Don’t be afraid of making noise during sex, rather than resist it – which resistance can tend to switch you to the flip-side from pleasure to pain.

One last tip: on entry, push slightly against his penis, as if you’re pushing it away with your anus. It may seem counter-intuitive but it works.

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