You’re at the stage when you’re ready to make love? While you can’t guarantee mind-blowing sex on the first night, you can ensure your new lover comes back for a second helping!
So you’ve got to the stage where you’re ready to make love. Most people would agree that you can’t guarantee mind-blowing sex on your first attempt, as you’ll be getting to know your lover’s body. Everyone likes different things; some women have an extremely sensitive clitoris whereas others like a fair bit of pressure. Some men love having their balls played with and others shy way from any such contact.
Spending time getting to know your partner’s likes and dislikes is an essential – and enjoyable – part of lovemaking. As ever, communication is the key. Don’t be afraid to tell your partner what you like – and ask what their favourite things are.
Remember, sex isn’t just about the body. Getting your mind aroused will make for a far sexier experience. Flirt with each other and maybe talk sexily to help make sure that the bodies most important sexual organ – the brain – is stimulated.
Once you’re both feeling mentally turned on, get your bodies into gear. Men and women share certain visual signs of arousal. Watch out for colour changes in the skin (usually a flush) and erect nipples. Rapid breathing is also a common sign that you’re hot to trot.
Sex play should prepare the vagina and penis for penetration. Women in particular may find sex uncomfortable if they haven’t had enough foreplay to get those juices flowing. If you’re naturally quite dry, even with lots of foreplay, get some water-based or silicon-based lubricant to help ease things along – and put a drop in the condom to make things better for him too.
When you’re both ready, slip that condom on and get into whichever position you feel like. The first time probably isn’t the time to try weird and wonderful positions. Stick to something simple; you’ve got plenty of time to experiment later.
Only 25 per cent of women achieve climax through penetration alone so don’t feel bad if you don’t come through sex. Ask your partner to help you have an orgasm with his fingers or tongue, either before or after penetration. You may also find that masturbating during sex helps you achieve orgasm.
Men go through a resting phase before getting another erection. The length of this varies according to age and other factors. Some men find they are only capable of getting hard once. Women, on the other hand, can have many orgasms in one session. If you’re still frisky when your man’s all soft, try masturbating in front of him. Not only will it give you the orgasm you’re after but it will also show him what you really like – and has a pretty good chance of getting him hard again so that you can start the whole fun process again!