Play the dating game

Everyone’s got a horror story to share when it comes to chat-up lines from hell! Brush up your dating skills with our guide to chatting up a potential date.

As you know, what you say is far less important than how you behave. However, saying the right thing – and having confidence – is also important. Have you ever been to a party wearing your funkiest outfit, only to spend most of the night alone because you weren’t feeling confident?

Conversely, have you noticed how many times you meet someone gorgeous when you’ve just nipped out to the shops in your ‘lounging around’ clothes? It’s down to self-confidence. When you’re not looking for a partner, you’re more likely to act naturally. And if you look confident, you look like you’ll be a fun person to date.

Almost everyone gets nervous when they first approach someone they’re interested in, so sometimes it can seem easier to have a ‘line’ to fall back on. Actually, you’re more likely to get a positive response if you’re honest. If possible, get a mutual friend to introduce you, picking their brains about your ‘targets’ interests first.

If the person is a stranger, stand near them and subtly listen in on the conversation. When something comes up that you know about, lean over, smile and say ‘I couldn’t help overhearing. I had to say I agree with what your saying. Have you heard…’ or something similar. With any luck you’ll get integrated into the conversation and can get to know your object of desire.

If they’re on their own, try to pick up on a shared interest. If they’re reading, comment on the book – apologising for interrupting first. If you’re in a bar, buy a drink when they do and see if you can start a conversation based on what they buy – ask them to recommend a wine or whether their lager is OK because the last one you had at the pub was a bit iffy. Ask open-ended questions to make the conversation easy.

Questioning potential partners about themselves is flattering as it shows that you are interested in them. However, avoid the question ‘what do you do’ as it may seem like you’re more interested in their wallet than their personality, or they could have a job that they’re embarrassed about. Ask them what they enjoy doing instead.

Most people have got at least one horror story about chat-up lines. Maybe you’ve asked someone “Are your legs tired? You’ve been running through my mind all day.” only to be told ‘Yes, I was looking for a brain cell.’ Or perhaps you’ve been the person cringing when someone gives you 10p and tells you to call your mum because you’re not going home. Either way, it’s pretty obvious that chat up lines only work if the person concerned is already interested. Otherwise, you’re just as likely to get a slap as a date.

Lines to avoid

  • (Beckoning a woman with your finger) I made you come using just one finger. Imagine what I could do with my whole hand.
  • Is it hot in here or is it just you?
  • If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put U and I together.
  • Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk past you again?
  • If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?
  • You’ve got such a heavenly body that I’ve named a star after you.
Posted in Flirting Tips, Relationships