Get the buzz on sex toys

sex toys

Satisfaction guaranteed. Make your love-play extra pleasurable with our guide to vibrators, dildos and other fun sex toys.

Many couples find that they can add a touch of excitement to their sex life by using sex aids and toys. They’re quite safe, provided they are used for the purpose they were designed for, though you’re more likely to come to grief if you use something that is not designed for this purpose.

The vast majority of aids need no more servicing other than a thorough clean, and if used with imagination in a loving relationship they can give countless hours of sensual pleasure.


By far the most popular of all sex toys is the vibrator. They are used mainly by women, but men also find them pleasurable. They need little care except for washing after use and ensuring that the batteries are in top condition.

Be inventive and explore all over you body with the vibrator. You may be surprised at the areas they feel terrific when vibrated and massaged. Try different speeds of vibration. Some areas of the body are stimulated most when the vibration is coarse and some when it is fine. Most vibrators have a speed adjustment for this.

Exploring your genitals

Once you have experimented with the vibrator on various parts of your body, you can now turn to your vulva. Start with the vibrator at a medium speed and rub it around the tops of your thighs, then move it around the pubic area.

Next, stimulate the area between the vagina and anus. This part can be particularly sensitive on some women. Now open the lips of your vulva with the fingers of one hand and gently find where the vibrator gives the most arousal.

Most women find that stimulating the clitoris directly is too powerful, or can actually be unpleasant, so start by experimenting around the clitoral area.

After a few minutes’ experimenting, you will have a fairly good idea of what you most enjoy. If you start to have really powerful sensations you might want to go straight on to have an orgasm. If you prefer not to at this stage, try the vibrator inside your vagina.

By now you will probably be highly aroused and so will be wet with natural secretions. If not, use a little saliva on the vibrator, KY jelly or a sexual lubricant.

Another method is to try playing with the vibrator around the anal region. Many women enjoy the sensations produced by vibrating this area and a few, especially those who enjoy anal sex, like the vibrator actually inside them.

Men and vibrators

Men can enjoy being stimulated with a vibrator, but they rarely get as much pleasure out of it as their partner. Some men like certain parts of their body stimulated and a few like their genitals vibrated, but it rarely causes an orgasm as it does in women.

A man whose anus is highly sensitive can greatly enjoy both external and internal vibration and, as in women, the G spot (prostate gland) can be stimulated to great effect with a vibrator. This can best be done with him lying down with his legs pulled back and the vibrator inserted several inches and aimed at the front wall of the back passage.

Improving orgasm

Vibrators are put to best use by women who are unable to have orgasms without powerful stimulation from a source other than their fingers. Use of a vibrator can actually teach them to have an orgasm and they can then transfer the ability to the own, or their lover’s, fingers.

Many women are concerned they will become addicted to the stimulation of a vibrator – but this is rarely so.


A dildo is a penis-shaped, usually latex rubber object, especially made to be put into the vagina. They are useful when the man cannot achieve an erection because he is impotent or has a nervous disorder which prevents erection. Some dildos have vibrator units built into them.

Apart from the above, the main users of dildos are women who like something inside their vaginas as they masturbate.

A dildo is easy to use and, unlike a real penis, has great stamina – so is ideal for the woman who needs lots of thrusting to have an orgasm. Most women when they masturbate insert two fingers into their vagina so a dildo of this size is best. It can be held still, thrust in and out just inside the vaginal entrance, or thrust deeply in and out as the woman likes.

More unusual dildos have a squeezable bulb at the end which can be made to ejaculate milk or water as the woman climaxes. Double-ended dildos are suitable for two women at once, while others can be inflated by squeezing a bulb so that their girth can be altered to fit the vagina of the user. This is useful for women whose vagina has become slack after having children.

More sex toys

Sexy underwear

This is probably the most widespread of sex ‘aids’, and the ways in which it can be used are numerous, but here are a few tips.

Make the giving and receiving of gifts of sexy undies into a game. Take the opportunity to dress up in them as soon as you can so that your man knows that you like them. Do a striptease for him, or let him undress you.

Leave one piece of your underwear on when making love, such as the suspenders or stockings. You might both find this highly arousing.

If the man is away from home, he can send some sexy undies through the post to his partner. She can then wear them while he is away and write, email or phone to tell him all about them. This can be highly exciting for some men.

Pretend that the woman is a model for a catalogue and get her to pose in her sexy undies for photos. She can strip them off as the session progresses.

Penis rings

Any man who puts a ring around the base of his penis will have a bigger erection because the blood that would normally flow out of the penis becomes trapped in the penis, causing it to swell. Penis rings are useful, but must be chosen with care. Never use metal rings. They can be very difficult to remove, this causing injury. Use flexible or adjustable rings. That way, you’ll get the right fit.

Anal stimulators

The simplest of these are attached to ordinary vibrators and are easy to use. As long as they are firmly attached, all should be well. They are very narrow and can do no harm to the anus itself.

When inserting anything else into the anus, be sure that you stretch the anal sphincters slowly or it can be very painful. Special butt-plugs, wide latex aids that stretch the anus, are available. These are safe provided they are not inserted deeply. They should also have a flanged base, do they don’t get lost.

If ever anything you do to your anus makes it bleed, it is probably best to stop and not do it again. Never put anything into your anus that is not made for it. The anal muscles can be very powerful and things can break off and become trapped inside.

Posted in Sex, Sex Play