Anticipation is a wonderful thing. Think back to the days of teenage fumbling, before you’d ever had sex. The urgency, the arousal and the beautifully aching frustration of wanting someone so much that it hurts can create a serious high.
But as we get older, things often speed up. Sex happens far earlier in a relationship and the anticipation fades. While sex in a loving relationship can be fantastic, when you’re starting out with someone new, you’ve got a chance to relive your youth. Savour the early days before you get round to having sex. See how sexy stalling things can be with these tips. Slowing down can really hot things up.
Spend at least one early date kissing on the sofa. Don’t remove any clothes. Enjoy the frisson of holding back. Have a marathon snogging session as if you were 16 again. Try it at the cinema or on the back of the bus and relive those early experiences.
Communicate with your eyes what you want to do with the rest of your body. Intense eye contact can get the pulse racing as much as hot and heavy action!
Talk about what you want to do to each other. It’s a great way to find out if you’ll be sexually compatible and will leave you breathless with desire.
Masturbate when you get in after a night out with your partner, thinking about what you’re going to do in the future. If you’re feeling brave and you think it’s appropriate, tell them what you’ve been doing. There are few bigger compliments you can pay someone.
Feed each other, sucking on each other’s fingers to suggest what you might be doing at a later date…
If someone isn’t prepared to wait, chances are they won’t be around for that long after you have had sex. If you’re happy with that, go ahead, making sure you practice safer sex. But if not, then you’ll save yourself a lot of heartbreak by holding out that little bit longer. More to the point, you’ll have great fun. There’s a lot to be said for whar was called ‘courting’ in the old days.
Remember, all good things come to those who wait…